Perimenopause crept up on me slowly… and then it hit me like a freight train. One day, I was working with a client, and suddenly, I couldn’t remember how to use an accounting software program, which I taught others how to use! That, and a few other memory loss moments, were disturbing. But I shrugged them off.
Meanwhile, I wasn’t feeling like my happy self. But I chalked it up to “too much going on in my life.” I started to act out of character. I didn’t realize that hormonal changes had compromised my mental clarity.
I convinced myself that I was the issue. I blamed myself for making poor judgments. I berated myself for lashing out. I called myself lazy when my motivation hit rock bottom. I was taken over by self-doubt.
My insomnia made things worse. I slept 2-3 hours every night, even with sleep aid, and I blamed it on my “neighbors from hell.” This, coupled with a nervous stomach that would not calm down, turned me into a wreck.
I suffered from anxiety. I had panic attacks. I started to suffer from high blood pressure, thyroid issues, hypoglycemia, chronic constipation, SIBO… you name it, I got it.
It was as if some alien had taken over my mind and body. I could not control my energy-draining thoughts or physical discomfort. I was scared that something terrible was happening on the inside.